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Jacqueline Harkins

I am 2 years since my surgery where they were only able to remove 20% of the tumor so I followed with 6 weeks of chemo and then 3 blasts of stereotactic treatment. I was never told what to expect and each time I went to my neurologist and shared how I was feeling I would end the meeting asking if I was progressing normally and I would end up in tears. At this point I am still exhausted, stay in bed for 12-14 hours hoping to get some sleep in between the tossing and turning and worrying about everything under the sun. I have nighttime hallucinations and audible hallucinations and those don’t help my sleeping either. I am anxious about everything that needs Anything done and any decision made. I don’t leave my house unless I absolutely have to and I need a couple of days to prepare myself so I don’t panic. Based on my past I know that if I get in a panic or severely depressed if I isolate myself and allow myself to feel those feelings I can talk myself down until the next time. I need alone and quiet time regularly and I am able to because the kids are grown and there is no spouse. I constantly look online for any kind of lifeline to help me understand what to expect or anything really and there was nothing until I found IJB. Based on what I have read on your website, this is exactly where I need to be so I can begin to understand, accept and grow going forward. Sorry for the rambling. Oh and I also have a huge case of the “I don’t care”.
Got any suggestions on how to get some back?