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Just because I look fine doesn’t mean I am. My hair may cover it all up but on the inside I changed dramatically. Just because my tumor was benign doesn’t mean I am “in the clear.” I still have annual MRIs and doctor’s appointments. I have a permanent drain in my brain. This December/January marks the 20th anniversary of my diagnosis and two surgeries. I thought about having a celebration but that time of year I always feel out-of-sorts. It is as if it is 1989/1990 and I just had the surgeries. I can still hear the words so clearly, “There is something in your brain and it needs to be removed.”